Since GS doesn't post much around here anymore, I thought I'd post this in memory of him...
It's not a fight, just right<<<
It's not a fight, just right
By Tom Knott
The Twins are holding Armed Services Appreciation Night in the Metrodome Monday, which seems a fitting gesture as our nation endeavors to eliminate the animals who steer commercial jets into buildings and behead innocents in the name of God.
?The Twins are offering half-price admission to current and retired military personnel and their families. They also plan to hand out 5,000 G.I. Joe action figures to children. As part of the festivities, Gov. Tim Pawlenty will be on hand to welcome the return of C Company, 142nd Engineer Battalion of the Minnesota National Guard.
The tribute to our military men and women appears genuine and worthy, whether or not you agree with the policies that led to our military actions in Afghanistan and Iraq. Our military men and women do not make foreign policy. They follow a chain of command that springs from the Pentagon and the White House.
?So a tribute, in one of our stadiums of the heartland, is a positive thing, clearly an apolitical event.
?Or so you might think.
?Nothing, it seems, is free of politics during this mother of all presidential campaigns, as the Twins have learned. Nothing is off-limits to the element of America that subscribes to the money-making, fantasy-filled, conspiracy theories of the tub of lard known as Michael Moore.
?At least two peace-loving groups in Minnesota have voiced objections to the doling out of the G.I. Joe action dolls. They see the dolls as a glorification of war, and war, as we learned from World War II historian Steven Spielberg, is an awful thing. You hand a G.I. Joe doll to a young boy, and the next thing you know, he probably will stick women's panties on the doll's head and maybe put it on a mini-leash.
?Someone with the Friends for a Non-Violent World says, "It's not a credible way to honor those who've suffered the inhumanity of war."
?You always love the titles of these groups: Friends for a Non-Violent World. Who can argue against Friends for a Non-Violent World?
?Well, Osama bin Laden and his thousands of nutty followers are against a nonviolent world.
?In fact, if they could, they would slip into a meeting of the Friends for a Non-Violent World, pull out their butcher knives and get down to the gruesome business of removing a few more heads of the infidels.
?Clearly, the Friends for a Non-Violent World are missing something in the video of Nicholas Berg's beheading on the Internet. Maybe it is the chanting of the hooded vermin before one reaches for Berg's head and then proceeds to remove it in a tortuous, fitful manner.
?There is a stunning disconnect with all these groups. They might issue objections to G.I. Joe or American soldiers stacking nude scumbags on top of one another, but they are unusually quiet around a head that is placed on a body, as if it were an ornament.
?Which part of the recent beheadings is so hard to comprehend? You say the beheadings have no connection to G.I. Joe? It is all connected, the series of beheadings merely the latest acts of twisted minds who declared war on us long ago.
?We just chose to ignore it before September?11. Right. An eye for an eye, and the world goes blind. We also know now that guns don't kill people; G.I. Joe dolls kill people. Nothing against the Friends for a Non-Violent World, but it is almost as if these types have had a psychotic break from reality. We have severed heads on the Internet, and yet these types take issue with a doll.
?Maybe the Twins should be passing out Ken and Barbie dolls instead.
?A person with the Veterans for Peace says, "I think the Twins are way off base with this idea. For gosh sakes, the last place we need to promote war is at our national pastime."
?For gosh sakes, nothing in this event promotes war, not even G.I. Joe. It is a doll. The Twins are hardly handing out posters that read: "Give war a chance." They merely are taking a well-deserved moment to acknowledge the service and sacrifices of our military men and women.
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I dunno about you guys, but I've noticed a stunning, even psychotic disconnect from reality suffered by people who write articles like this. They seem to think everything in the world is related to Osama, beheadings or killings of one kind or another. That constant focusing on death and dismemberment can't be healthy.
It's kinda funny how he blasts these guys that "issue objections to G.I. Joe ... but are unusually quiet around a head that is placed on a body" for getting all bent out of shape about a doll when it looks like, from where I'm standing, that he's the one that's getting all huffy and puffy about it.
Jesus christ people, it's just a fucking doll. Not a liberal conspiracy. Not a glorification of war. It's. Just. A. Doll.
So anyway, I hope you all enjoyed that as much as I did. The shot at Michael Moore was a nice touch. Really cemented the "I'm a raving lunatic" sign I pictured around his neck.
