The Absolute Worst?

[Mr. Lothario]

     This just popped into my head: what is the absolute worst thing you've ever heard (or read, as the case may be) in conversation? Use whatever sense of "worst" you like. : D

[BTs_GhostSniper]

[***ATTENTION*** The following post is extremely graphic in nature. Read at your own risk. Ace]

Okay, I studied Nazi torture techniques as part of my history studies on WWII.  But some of the truely terrible stuff happened during medical experiments when "Dr. Death" would attempt to see how much pain the human body could endure.  The one that scared me the most (I would rather die than have this happen) is the following:

They would have you strapped down, totally nude on a hospital bed in a small room.  In walks a beautiful nurse whose only job was to come in and make you really horny.  So, after she got you good and hard, she unstraps you and lets you get really comfortable with her.  Then two male nurses come in, grab you, hold you down, and another nurse comes in and shoves a glass cylinder in your erect penis.  That fourth nurse then has the other two nurses position you over a table and she crushes the glass in your dick with a large flat hammer (something like a mallett).  After this, most people simply passed out from the pain.  Many of them awoke to find that Dr. Death had then either amputated or mutilated their penis.  Some of them had to endure being awake for that.

After reading about that one, I quickly decided some things really are worse than death.

Oh, and if anybody wants to know about any particular groups torture methods, just pm me and I'll tell you all about them.  I know about the Japanese, German, Vietnamese, North Korean, Chinese, and Russian techniques.  I also have studied the British Torture techniques from pre-20th century days.

Peace.

-GhostSniper Out.

[spike]

Well theres blatent innapropriatness, and then theres just horrible. Making fun of someones mom right after she has died is pretty bad. In regards to the Nazi torture techniques, I seem to remember reading in Rise and Fall of the Third Reich that the wife of one of those doctors had a lamp shade made out of the skin people. When this person saw an interesting tattoo that they liked, they, I guess, would have the skin removed, and added to the lampshade.

[Ace]

Well this got really depressing real quick, so I'll leave something I said that was so wrong that it was hilarious.

I have a roommate with a girlfriend who is definitely on the tiny side. And I mean tiny. This girl can't weight more than 80 lbs. The common consensus among us is that she may have an eating disorder. So one day me, him, and her are at my place, and he is eating. He drops a chip on her, and when he goes to pick it up he offers it to her. She refuses, and he says something along the lines of "It wouldn't hurt you to eat it." Me, being a wiseass, instantly snap back with "Yeah, and we got a tub of lard in the fridge too if you need some." I think they were both too shocked to get pissed at what I said right away. I was still shocked that I blurted it out so fast, but that was soon overcome by an overwhelming desire to laugh hysterically.

[cookie]

i was eating dinner with my boyfriends family for the first time, and we're all laughing and telling stories, etc. his stepdad pipes up, and asks us if we want to hear a joke. sure, why not.

"how do you know when the 3 year old is enjoying the sex?" "when you hear the ribs crack"

this. at the table. i nearly choked.

i came over one time to find this same man relaxing in front of the big screen, with aviator glasses on, a du rag, a *purple* bathrobe, gold medallions, sipping a cup of coffee. he also has a moustache and long curly hair.

wow, i can't make amends for this.

[spike]

*Warning* graphic infant sex jokes below. *Warning*



Whats the worst part of having sex with an infant.

Washing the blood out of your clown suit

The difference between a pile of dead babies and a Cadillac?

I dont have a Cadillac in my garage


ahh dead baby jokes, I could go on and on, a teacher at my school used to tell em.

[Ace]

I really hate to continue such a bad trend, but I must steal a joke from Jewb.

How do you make a 4 year old cry twice? Wipe your cock on his teddy bear.

[Supernatural Pie]

Ace, I don't suppose you could increase the size and intensity of your post...

I really didn't want to read that, GS.

Really.

I didn't want to read that.

I really really really didn't want to read that.

Really.

[alaric]

[***ATTENTION*** The following post is extremely graphic in nature. Read at your own risk. Ace]

Okay, I studied Nazi torture techniques as part of my history studies on WWII.  But some of the truely terrible stuff happened during medical experiments when "Dr. Death" would attempt to see how much pain the human body could endure.  The one that scared me the most (I would rather die than have this happen) is the following:

They would have you strapped down, totally nude on a hospital bed in a small room.  In walks a beautiful nurse whose only job was to come in and make you really horny.  So, after she got you good and hard, she unstraps you and lets you get really comfortable with her.  Then two male nurses come in, grab you, hold you down, and another nurse comes in and shoves a glass cylinder in your erect penis.  That fourth nurse then has the other two nurses position you over a table and she crushes the glass in your dick with a large flat hammer (something like a mallett).  After this, most people simply passed out from the pain.  Many of them awoke to find that Dr. Death had then either amputated or mutilated their penis.  Some of them had to endure being awake for that.

After reading about that one, I quickly decided some things really are worse than death.

Oh, and if anybody wants to know about any particular groups torture methods, just pm me and I'll tell you all about them.  I know about the Japanese, German, Vietnamese, North Korean, Chinese, and Russian techniques.  I also have studied the British Torture techniques from pre-20th century days.

Peace.

-GhostSniper Out.

Holy fuck, i mean really, holy fuck.

You guys aren't gonna believe this but I used to have dreams about that shit. I'm not kidding, I don't think I knew about that before GS posted it, but I KNOW I used to have dreams like that.

Jesus Christ that's fucked up.

[c| Lone-Wolf]

*Dead Baby Joke Ahead*

Q: How do you fit a baby into a butter-tub?
A: Meat grinder.

Q: How do you get it out?
A: Tortilla chips.

[*NADS Capt. Anarchy]

mm...

The absolute worst thing I know of...

Well, probably my pal James the ex-crackhead, who did a American History-X style curb stomp on a dude he was trying to collect some money from.

[c| Lone-Wolf]

How about the people in WW2 who were used as living test dummies for new types of German and Japanese ammunition?  They'd just take a prisoner, shoot them at a set range, and see what the bullet did, and how long it took them to die.  Or, in the case of the Japanese, they would allow medics to train on the now wounded prisoner...without anesthetic.  Of course if they saved them they were sent back to work the next day or executed...factor into that the horrible conditions of the Japanese POW camps, and you get something very very ugly...amazing that anybody could hold out for even a month in those conditions, let alone 4 years in some cases.

[PsYcO aSsAsSiN]

Damn, a lot of you are sick fucks.

[BTs_GhostSniper]

Damn, a lot of you are sick fucks.

Why thank you, PsYcO.....that is perhaps the nicest thing you've ever said about me

[Brain]

let's see the absolute worst thing...i'll do what i can imaginebecause nothing else is coming to mind

 that would have to be bondo coming back to the forums, and hacking us all out of our mod status, and installing rapid as the sole admin of the battle league, and spamming explicit pictures of his and rapid's honeymoon

[BTs_GhostSniper]

let's see the absolute worst thing...i'll do what i can imaginebecause nothing else is coming to mind
 that would have to be bondo coming back to the forums, and hacking us all out of our mod status, and installing rapid as the sole admin of the battle league, and spamming explicit pictures of his and rapid's honeymoon

Yikes!  Although I don't know those two personally, their reputation precedes them.  That is scary!

[PsYcO aSsAsSiN]

Yikes!  Although I don't know those two personally, their reputation precedes them.  That is scary!

That is more scary than you can even imagine...only to possibly make it worse would be to install Snipey, Romulus, and Peekay as a moderator in some way, shape or form.

[BTs_FahQ2]

Hmmm,

Absolute worst is the smell of someone burning to death, hearing them scream, and watching them melt.  May I drink till I never see, hear, smell or remember any of this.

[Mr.Mellow]

Worst way to die: Drowning in raw sewage.

[every time i die]

some guy on long island where i live drowned in raw sewage after his cesspool collapsed underneath him. his kids watched him drown in their turds.