*DAMN R6 Forum

     This just popped into my head: what is the absolute worst thing you've ever heard (or read, as the case may be) in conversation? Use whatever sense of "worst" you like. : D

[***ATTENTION*** The following post is extremely graphic in nature. Read at your own risk. Ace]

Okay, I studied Nazi torture techniques as part of my history studies on WWII.  But some of the truely terrible stuff happened during medical experiments when "Dr. Death" would attempt to see how much pain the human body could endure.  The one that scared me the most (I would rather die than have this happen) is the following:

They would have you strapped down, totally nude on a hospital bed in a small room.  In walks a beautiful nurse whose only job was to come in and make you really horny.  So, after she got you good and hard, she unstraps you and lets you get really comfortable with her.  Then two male nurses come in, grab you, hold you down, and another nurse comes in and shoves a glass cylinder in your erect penis.  That fourth nurse then has the other two nurses position you over a table and she crushes the glass in your dick with a large flat hammer (something like a mallett).  After this, most people simply passed out from the pain.  Many of them awoke to find that Dr. Death had then either amputated or mutilated their penis.  Some of them had to endure being awake for that.

After reading about that one, I quickly decided some things really are worse than death.

Oh, and if anybody wants to know about any particular groups torture methods, just pm me and I'll tell you all about them.  I know about the Japanese, German, Vietnamese, North Korean, Chinese, and Russian techniques.  I also have studied the British Torture techniques from pre-20th century days.

Peace.

-GhostSniper Out.

Well theres blatent innapropriatness, and then theres just horrible. Making fun of someones mom right after she has died is pretty bad. In regards to the Nazi torture techniques, I seem to remember reading in Rise and Fall of the Third Reich that the wife of one of those doctors had a lamp shade made out of the skin people. When this person saw an interesting tattoo that they liked, they, I guess, would have the skin removed, and added to the lampshade.

Well this got really depressing real quick, so I'll leave something I said that was so wrong that it was hilarious.

I have a roommate with a girlfriend who is definitely on the tiny side. And I mean tiny. This girl can't weight more than 80 lbs. The common consensus among us is that she may have an eating disorder. So one day me, him, and her are at my place, and he is eating. He drops a chip on her, and when he goes to pick it up he offers it to her. She refuses, and he says something along the lines of "It wouldn't hurt you to eat it." Me, being a wiseass, instantly snap back with "Yeah, and we got a tub of lard in the fridge too if you need some." I think they were both too shocked to get pissed at what I said right away. I was still shocked that I blurted it out so fast, but that was soon overcome by an overwhelming desire to laugh hysterically.

i was eating dinner with my boyfriends family for the first time, and we're all laughing and telling stories, etc. his stepdad pipes up, and asks us if we want to hear a joke. sure, why not.

"how do you know when the 3 year old is enjoying the sex?" "when you hear the ribs crack"

this. at the table. i nearly choked.

i came over one time to find this same man relaxing in front of the big screen, with aviator glasses on, a du rag, a *purple* bathrobe, gold medallions, sipping a cup of coffee. he also has a moustache and long curly hair.

wow, i can't make amends for this.

*Warning* graphic infant sex jokes below. *Warning*



Whats the worst part of having sex with an infant.

Washing the blood out of your clown suit

The difference between a pile of dead babies and a Cadillac?

I dont have a Cadillac in my garage


ahh dead baby jokes, I could go on and on, a teacher at my school used to tell em.

I really hate to continue such a bad trend, but I must steal a joke from Jewb.

How do you make a 4 year old cry twice? Wipe your cock on his teddy bear.

Ace, I don't suppose you could increase the size and intensity of your post...

I really didn't want to read that, GS.

Really.

I didn't want to read that.

I really really really didn't want to read that.

Really.

Holy fuck, i mean really, holy fuck.

You guys aren't gonna believe this but I used to have dreams about that shit. I'm not kidding, I don't think I knew about that before GS posted it, but I KNOW I used to have dreams like that.

Jesus Christ that's fucked up.

*Dead Baby Joke Ahead*

Q: How do you fit a baby into a butter-tub?
A: Meat grinder.

Q: How do you get it out?
A: Tortilla chips.

mm...

The absolute worst thing I know of...

Well, probably my pal James the ex-crackhead, who did a American History-X style curb stomp on a dude he was trying to collect some money from.

How about the people in WW2 who were used as living test dummies for new types of German and Japanese ammunition?  They'd just take a prisoner, shoot them at a set range, and see what the bullet did, and how long it took them to die.  Or, in the case of the Japanese, they would allow medics to train on the now wounded prisoner...without anesthetic.  Of course if they saved them they were sent back to work the next day or executed...factor into that the horrible conditions of the Japanese POW camps, and you get something very very ugly...amazing that anybody could hold out for even a month in those conditions, let alone 4 years in some cases.

Damn, a lot of you are sick fucks.

Why thank you, PsYcO.....that is perhaps the nicest thing you've ever said about me :)

let's see the absolute worst thing...i'll do what i can imaginebecause nothing else is coming to mind

 that would have to be bondo coming back to the forums, and hacking us all out of our mod status, and installing rapid as the sole admin of the battle league, and spamming explicit pictures of his and rapid's honeymoon

Yikes!  Although I don't know those two personally, their reputation precedes them.  That is scary!

That is more scary than you can even imagine...only to possibly make it worse would be to install Snipey, Romulus, and Peekay as a moderator in some way, shape or form.

Hmmm,

Absolute worst is the smell of someone burning to death, hearing them scream, and watching them melt.  May I drink till I never see, hear, smell or remember any of this.

Worst way to die: Drowning in raw sewage.

some guy on long island where i live drowned in raw sewage after his cesspool collapsed underneath him. his kids watched him drown in their turds.

That is definitely not the worst way to die.

the worst way to die is being torchered to death while being forced to listen to William Hung... :o :o

If you can come up with something worse, I'd like to hear it... I'm talking about things that could possibly happen, not things like, say, being kidnapped by rabid Islamic extremists, getting partially skinned and gutted while you're fully conscious, being doused in alcohol, lit on fire, having salt thrown on your wounds, and then being thrown into a vat of boiling water to drown/boil.

Here's something worse:

130 soldiers dead in one day in Iraq.

http://www.sky.com/skynews/article/0,,30200-13047720,00.html (http://www.sky.com/skynews/article/0,,30200-13047720,00.html)

SkyNews is citing Pentagon reports:

A large number of?soldiers have been killed in fierce fighting in Iraq, according to unconfirmed reports.

>>>
Some reports have put the toll as high as 130 but others have put the death toll at 12 with 20 wounded.

The large scale battle, described as "intense", has taken place in the town of Ar Ramadi, 20 miles west of Fallujah.

Sky News' David Chater said: "None of this is official yet - none of it is confirmed."
<<<

Here's hoping it's really 12, and not a man higher.

130 huh? where do you find these sites?

and hows this for bad? ... http://www.cnn.com/2004/HEALTH/04/06/health.caesarean.reut/index.html

I think we just need to jump in the wayback machine with Mr. Peabody and take a look at some of the forms of execution in the past.

A nasty impalement - you are set on the sharpened end of stake in the ground (think spear without an iron point).  As you tire and relax, you continue to sink lower on the stake, until it's through you.  Oh, yeah, for the sadistic, the point of the stake was in your anus.

Crucifixion - nailed to a cross or x by your wrists, as you tire you eventually can't breath.

The slow death - a piece of you removed once each day, joint by joint.  First your toes, knuckle by knuckle, to your ankles, knees and hips.  Then your fingers, it's 30 days until both hands are gone at the wrist.

Drawn and quartered - nothing like having your intestines cut out and burned in front of your eyes up on a stage, until they get bored with that and eventually cut you into 4 pieces (five really, since you are beheaded too).

Crushing - Done by many countries and using anything from elephants sitting on you to rocks, but most brutally in Malawa and here in America.  In Malawa, you are laid on a platform, while a second platform is set atop you.  There is a space cut out for your head.  The Sultan would then have women from his harem stand on the platform until the two met.  Stories of men's internal organs shooting out of their mouths are told.  In America the rolling stones used for pressing Apples into cider were often used.  Think about being run over very slowly by a steamroller, starting at your toes, and you'll have the picture.

These are all common forms of execution in our collective past, many were actually listed in the laws of the time.

i think it would suck to get pushed down a slide of razor blades into a pool of vinager. aiie.

i visited the torture museum in san diego, and that was some of the worst shit i've ever seen. one method was where they'd chain you upside down, and saw you apart starting between your legs. they'd did the upside down thing so that you'd stay concious longer. sometimes they got all the way down to your ribcage before you died.

or the being flayed alive one. they'd cut and peel off layers of your skin.

Loth? Explain. I know you have something to do with this....
***frowns disapprovingly

In fitting with the "worst" theme of this thread, I'll leave you all with a morsel of insight from Snoop Dogg.

One day someone asked Snoop what the worst thing he had ever seen backstage.

He replied, "Ugly bitches."

The romans were pretty good at the "worst".  

They would get a few gents they didn't care for anymore and invite them to a party.  This party would have chicks, music and as much booze as you could drink.  Well they let you get going and get pretty loaded of the wine, then they grabbed you.  At this point a tight string is put around your penis so that nothing can get out, mainly urine.  So at this point the vicitim(s) are pretty scared and they just remembered they consumed all of that fucking wine.  Well, the piss need gets flowing, but hey, you can't go now.  All the time everyone is just watching go fucking nuts as the need to piss turns into violent pain.  At this point the need to urinate gets so bad that it begins to back up into every valve that leads to your bladder.  This eventually fills and then a mild pop is heard.  Your bladder has just exploaded inside you.  So at this point you begin to slowly die from the poisoning from your urine and the internal bleeding.  

It would take about a 2-3 days for you to finally die, after your penis dies from lack of circulation, internal poisoning from the urine and the slow bleeding from a popped bladder.  So next time your "buds" invite you out for a drink, make sure you can kick their asses.

The penalty for sleeping with a vestal virgin in rome was something like being tied into a sack with a cat and an asp, and then thrown  in the river. The cat goes crazy and scratches you etc, while you drown. ew.
The worst way to die has always seemed to be to be drowning. I have a massive fear of drowning.

It was either the greeks or the romans who had the bronze bull which was this huge bull made out of bronze that they put over a fire and then placed you in. You would fry like a cat in a oven and they would sometimes have special mouthpieces on the bull that would distort your screams as you died

sry bout the double post but i thought of another thats non death related
A kid I knew and his dad died in a car wreck and a couple days afterwards i heard a hick making some racist comments about the kid who was only 9
ex/ good thing that ****** is dead cause i would've killed him anyways

I'd have to say the worst way to die is to fall in a river of acid.

Only if it's a somewhat weak acid, Mysty. =D Otherwise it'd probably be over sorta quick, kinda like lava. Sitting in acid for 12 hours, waiting til you finally die=Classic. Not really. But...you know.

That damn Batman always found a way out before he melted!

Being lowered slowly into a small pool of sharks with laser beams attached to their heads.

Why didn't Rome think of that?

 ;)

     Somebody needs to come up with a torture execution for the 21st century. Like, say, wrapping ten turns or so of thin, strong wire around each of your limbs and your abdomen. Then attach the ends of the wires to an electric winch, and tie the winch control to a computer that activates it at random intervals and speeds. Thin wire on soft flesh pulled strongly like that should slice right through down to the bone, but slowly, oh so slowly, if done right.

nah... if you want to go high tech, you need to do something like sensory deprivation and sleep deprivation.  then occasionally make loud sounds and bright flashes of light along with whispers... then you get to watch as the victims mind slowly tears its self apart

     Sure, but that's not really an execution. It's hardly even torture. Instead, it's an interrogation technique.

and what do you think interrogation is?
it's no differet than torture with no intent to kill until you have what you want  besides, the mental anguish one experiences as one goes insane questioning their sanity is far beyond the any other pain man can inflict

This sounds just like when you come home at 4am smelling of Newcastle and your girl asks you "how was your night?" ;D